Remember dudes, if you’re not a dude who’s obsessed with bedding ladies, well, you’re so gay, dude.

“If it’s not an April Fool’s joke (because it IS April 1st after all) I just wanted to give you two thumbs up for coming out last night (yay!). Aaaaand to let you know (for whatever it’s worth) that I personally knew all along (if it is for realz), but that my bro / sis weren’t exactly sure. They did speculate from time to time, and you did confuse them a couple of birthdays ago when you got all flirty with our cousin.”